Category Archives: Archetype Dominance

Has Your High Priestess Been Shortchanged This Year? (How to Fix)

Your High Priestess and Your Empress Archetypes – Are Both Their Needs Being Met?

Introducing Julie Marie Rahm, certified YUEN Mastery Practitioner and Instructor

Julie Marie Rahm, the Resultant, is a  certified YUEN Mastery practitioner and instructor.

Julie Marie Rahm, the Resultant, is a certified YUEN Mastery practitioner and instructor.

This week’s Guest Blog by Julie Marie Rahm, the Resultant, gives us insight on how to regain our center when we’ve over-extended ourselves by nurturing and caring for others.

Julie applies YUEN Mastery, the New Science of Achieving Immediate Results; a blend of insight and logic with a dash of quantum physics. The bottom line – if you’re ready to be free of stress and pain, if you’re ready for self-mastery, if you’re ready to know what’s really going on in the world, then read her articles or schedule a one-on-one results-guaranteed telephone consultation with Julie.

Note from Alay’nya: Curious about the Yuen Method? I was. And I had my own consultation with Julie just yesterday. Learn more about this method in this week’s post from the Alay’nya Studio (look for the link two days from now, Thursday, Jan. 30th), and in next week’s blogpost here in The Unveiling Journey. (I’ll put the link in when I write next week’s post.)

It’s been less than twenty-four hours, and I can already feel the life-changing difference!

Our Inner Empress – Feeling Good through Helping Others Feel Good

We’ve just come out of the Season of the Empress. She was our dominant energy from Samhain (October 31st) to Winter Solstice (December 21st).

Our Empress Archetype Is All About Connecting and Nurturing.

The Empress - Major Arcana Card III - from the Touchstone Tarot by Kat Black.

The Empress – Major Arcana Card III – from the Touchstone Tarot by Kat Black.

When in our Empress mode, we’re under the sway of the powerful neurohormone oxytocin.

As beautifully described by Dr. Shelley Taylor in The Tending Instinct, oxytocin makes us seek out and find pleasure in the warmth of human connection.

When we are pregnant and mothers of young children, we are awash in oxytocin, and it governs much of what we do until our children leave home and menopause arrives. (Usually, these two events more-or-less coincide, and check out Dr. Louann Brizendine’s book, The Female Brain.)

Our Empress Archetype Causes Us to Bond with Animals

We get a surge of oxytocin, a feel-good neurohormone, from playing with warm, furry animals. Photo courtesy Sciencephotos.com.

We get a surge of oxytocin, a feel-good neurohormone, from playing with warm, furry animals. Photo courtesy Sciencephotos.com.

If we are not maternal – by nature or by life-role – we often nurture animals. Nothing like cuddling up with our pet cat, or romping with our dog, to release a good oxytocin surge into our brains – helping us feel calmer, more soothed, and more happy with life. Meg Daley Olmert describes how oxytocin helps the human-animal bond in Made for Each Other: The Biology of the Human-Animal Bond.

Obviously, both men and women access the Empress archetype – think of the many men who are devoted fathers, or whose lives involve caring for people and animals. It’s the same neurohormone that gives all of us satisfaction in the human-human or human-animal bond.

Our Empress Governs the Biggest Feast-Days and Holidays of the Year

In our Empress mode, we get satisfaction from nurturing others - particularly during holiday feasts!

In our Empress mode, we get satisfaction from nurturing others – particularly during holiday feasts!

It’s no coincidence that our Empress time encompasses the two biggest feasting, family, human-warmth-and-connection times of the year – Thanksgiving and Christmas.

But what happens when our Empress is overextended?

This can happen so, so easily.

Our Empress is about caring; not about setting boundaries. Thus, when someone needs her, she often responds without saying, No, I need time for myself right now.

Sometimes, there’s a crisis during the holidays and people need more time than expected.

Sometimes, there’s too much travel; too many demands on our time.

Sometimes, people come to visit – and stay longer than expected, or we have the lovely misfortune of living someplace where everyone wants to visit us over the holidays!

At the end of this time – special though it was – we need time for ourselves.

Our Inner High Priestess – Intuitive and Contemplative

The High Priestess, depicted by Mari.

The High Priestess, depicted by Mari-Na.

Our inner High Priestess is all about regrouping.

During the darkest time of winter, she’s about staying in bed for an extra hour or so each day.

Instead of focusing on the needs and wants of others, our High Priestess wants to not focus at all.

Our inner High Priestess wants to drift in a quiet, calm, contemplative space – and being forced to focus on anyone, or anything, is painful to this aspect of our psyche.

After being an Empress (sometimes for too long), we need our High Priestess to recharge.

Did you get your High Priestess time this year?

If you’re a little low on your High Priestess, you can still nurture her – and thus nurture your whole self.

Read this Guest Post from Julie Rahm to find out how.

Instant Rejuvenation for Generation Empress – Guest Post from Julie Marie Rahm, aka The Resultant

Forget about being a Baby Boomer. Aren’t we in fact the Sandwich Generation, caught in the middle?

Our adult offspring have boomeranged back home. Also, our aging parents need daily attention. Thus, perhaps an even more fitting title for our generation of women is Generation Empress.

If you are like me, you find yourself for months on end in full-throttle Empress mode, caring for and nurturing family, friends, clients.

Don’t get me wrong. I enjoy my family, friends, and clients. However, spending all of our time in Empress mode causes us to stagnate in body, mind, and spirit. Flow stops and unevenness sets in between others and us. Where there is unevenness, there is struggle. Struggle leads to reactions of anger and frustration.

What’s an Empress to do? Read on.

First, restore flow and thus rejuvenate by investing at least five minutes in contemplative High Priestess mode every day.

How? I recommend awakening five minutes earlier than usual. Sit in bed with the lights out. Imagine your day unfolding perfectly to your design. Most others are still asleep, so you can connect without static to the Universe and the Universe can connect back to you, supporting your design.

Then, strengthen yourself for your day.

How? Imagine a bright point of light moving quickly up and down from the crown of your head through your spine to the bottom of your tailbone. Run the light up and down eight times while saying to yourself “strengthen and delete.” Throughout the day, “run the light” any time you need a boost!

As you incorporate those first five minutes into each day, be willing to be amazed.

Expect to feel stronger and be happier.

My clients from ages eight to eighty agree that “running the light” daily is life changing. May it be for you, too!

Does Your Inner Empress Need to Recharge? (Ask Julie!)

Julie Marie Rahm, M.S., is a Resultant who resolves problems for individuals, families, schools, organizations, and businesses. How? She applies YUEN Mastery, the New Science of Immediate Results; a blend of insight and logic with a dash of quantum physics.

Julie is a certified YUEN Mastery practitioner and instructor. She earned her B.S. in physics and mathematics at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln, and her M.S. in industrial engineering at Georgia Tech. She worked for the U.S. Navy and Department of Defense for 20 years before applying physics and engineering to the human body and the human condition. Find her online at Problems-Resolved.com.

Healing Our Inner Emperor – What a Breakthrough Feels Like

A Healing Shift with My Emperor Archetype – from Controlling & Power-Grabbing to Wise & Benevolent

Lioness and lion, by Franco De Luco Calce.

Inner healing brings together our feminine and masculine archetypes. Photo of asiatic lioness and lion in Wild Love II series by Franco De Luca Calce.

Healing is much like integration.

Really, the two go hand-in-hand.

Over the past week, I’ve had a big, huge healing with my inner Emperor – one of the six core power archetypes that we each have.

I didn’t know that I needed this healing.

Also, I didn’t know how deeply this unhealed relationship had impacted my entire life – that it was a huge, pervasive pattern. (The full extent only popped out completely this last week.)

And I can’t say that everything – every aspect – is completely healed. Probably not. Probably more to go; multiple layers.

But this is big.

So huge, that I’m breaking with what I planned to write to you – which dealt with healings and breakthroughs of a different form – to introduce this new one.

Join me?

Unvl-bkgrnd-symmetric-lg-xtrct1

Before Healing – A Controlling Emperor Archetype

If you know me well (and many of you do), you’ll recognize that my attitude about men has not always been healthy.

Of course, this showed up in both my personal and professional life.

Ghengis Khan.

Ghengis Khan.

You may remember that I characterized the Emperor archetype in a not-too-kindly manner – the image that I selected to represent this archetype back less than a year ago was Ghengis Khan.

More to the point, I was wrestling with an oppressive inner Emperor – from Dethroning Your Emperor, written in March, 2013. (Even then, I was starting to shift – from dethroning to a more useful incorporation.)

More recently, I characterized my (and generally, our) inner Emperor as a resource-hog, in Is Your Emperor Ruling Your Life?.

Khan, like many other conquering Emperors, definitely embodied the Emperor archetype – but in a brutal and controlling and punitive sense. (Read a brief synopsis of Khan’s slaughter of the inhabitants of the Persian city Nishapur.) While his virtues of leadership, courage, organization were fabulous – as was his vision, focus, and tenacity – he was not a good or kind person. He’s reputed to have said, “It is not sufficient that I succeed – all others must fail.”

This is the dark side of our Emperor archetype.

Unvl-bkgrnd-symmetric-lg-xtrct1

After Healing – A Wise and Benevolent Emperor Archetype

The healing itself was preceded by several months of substantial attention to this area – no one big thing, but steadily clearing out the brushes.

I wrote about this in an earlier blog:

When we invoke our Emperor in a benevolent mode, he comes in as a rescuer. He brings not only structure and order, but strength and stability. He may bring some routine in to our lives …

When we do a higher level of life-integration, we call on our Emperor in a more powerful and comprehensive way.

When You’ve Betrayed Yourself and How to Recover, written October, 2013.

The healing itself took place within 24 hours. No one specific person “healed” me; there was no moment of divine intervention, but I knew – when I woke up the next morning – that my relationship with this whole archetype had shifted.

Emperor Kangxi.

Emperor Kangxi.

As I cast about inside my head for words to describe this new Emperor, the ones that seemed most appropriate were wise and benevolent.

Wise and benevolent, it seems, can be a success strategy. China’s Emperor Aixin-Juelo Xuanye (1654-1722) was known as Emperor Kangxi. His title means peace for all people and prosperity for all lands.

http://www.theunveilingjourney.com/2012/02/05/a-strong-inner-amazon-our-most-powerful-ally/

When You’ve Betrayed Yourself – And How to Recover

All Betrayal Is Really What We Do to Ourselves – and Yes, We CAN Recover!

Do you give yourself what you're really worth?

Do you give yourself what you’re really worth?

Right now, there’s a nationwide (and worldwide) concern about money.

The past three weeks have been thought-provoking for anyone in the United States. We’ve teetered dangerously close to the border of default. The Federal Government was shut down for nearly three weeks.

This means that even though the government (civil service) employees will get paid for their furloughed time, a great deal of churn has been thrown into the realm of government contractors, as well as the suppliers and service people who keep both the government and the contractors going.

In this particular area (North Virginia), it makes a big difference.

Throughout the whole country, though, there have been many people who’ve been asking themselves: How could I have put myself so much at risk?

This goes beyond government contractors and their support system. It includes the many people who are on Social Security, and who wonder about their economic future. It includes the many who lost the huge bulk of their retirement savings during the financial collapse of 2008, and who still have not recovered. It includes many of us who have leveraged ourselves into a tight position – those of us who have a steady job, with nice benefits – but little flexibility, and who feel trapped in the system.

Betrayal Is What We Do to Ourselves – and Then We Take Charge of Our Lives

I had a mentor once who famously said, We always know. We may not want to admit it to ourselves, but we always know.

When we set ourselves up for a tough spot, we also discern the tools and gifts that we need to move on.

When we set ourselves up for a tough spot, we also discern the tools and gifts that we need to move on.

It’s possibly no accident that of my last three face-to-face meetings, each has been with someone who has or is in the midst of stepping out of a corporate job – even a very nice and secure corporate job – and is striking out as an entrepreneur.

They’ve identified that the “betrayal” here was not so much entrusting the system (their job and the entire corporate culture) to take care of them financially, as it was in believing that they could “make it work” (for much longer than necessary) within that environment.

Intimate Relations and Job/Corporate Relations Riff on the Same Internal Dynamic

Our intimate relations often have the same dynamics as our job and social relations.

Our intimate relations often have the same dynamics as our job and social relations.

Over the last week, I’ve had in-depth conversations with four different women. Two of them – ones who are also just rebuilding their business lives – spent time recounting unhappy relationships or marriages. They’re carefully keeping themselves out of relationships right now, while they rebuild their lives.

The two others? Absolutely fabulous, totally enviable marriages. (One is newly married. She’s older than me, but is vibrant, glowing, and truly a blushing bride.) Of these, one has moved out from a secure position in which she’s been highly respected and wielded much influence. The other is getting ready to move on; retiring from a job that’s become stifling, and doing what makes her heart sing.

I see this a lot. There is often a common theme in our lives – one that we express again and again, in our selection of (and staying with) jobs, closest friends, and intimate partners. In other words, those people and institutions with whom we let down our walls – we open to some level of trust and vulnerability.

Sometimes we make great choices.

Sometimes, we make awful ones.

What Happens When We Dethrone Our Own Internal Emperor

Our Emperor archetype is our inner Protector and Provider. Of all the masculine roles, he is the one most charged with keeping us safe and secure.

Many of us, when we find that opening ourselves up has led us into disastrous situations (either financially or emotionally, or even both), do a sort of shock-reaction: we flip an internal switch and go into Emperor mode.

Sometimes, we go into Emperor mode early in life. This happens when we feel that our feminine aspects are too dangerous a place. This can be due to family or societal dynamics, or even one truly awful early-life experience. (Sometimes, a succession of them.) We flee our feminine selves, and put on a Warrior’s armor and an Emperor’s mindset.

I write about this extensively in:

What really happens when we do this, though, is that we engage a sort of pseudo-Emperor. We don’t have a real, fully-fledged Emperor running our show – we have an archetype who has the power to direct our attention, and make our judgment calls – but is not really there for us as either a Protector or as a Provider.

The result?

We work.

We work really, really hard.

We work really, really hard for years and years.

But – when we finally pull our heads up (or a corporate or national crisis forces us to step back and assess) – we realize: we haven’t protected or provided for ourselves at all. We’ve poured ourselves into a certain kind of task – but left ourselves with a kind of vulnerability.

In short, we’ve created our own Achilles’ heel. We have a vulnerability because we haven’t really dialed in to our Emperor archetype; we’ve never really let him take charge in an intelligent and useful way.

We’ve gone into Emperor-type activities, but we’ve not really let him Protect and Provide.

The crunch comes, and we’re devastated.

How to deal?

Will Our Real Emperor Please Stand Forth?

Our real Emperor persona is highly mature, and takes his responsibilities very seriously.

Let’s look at where he comes in during our archetypal evolution.

First, we invoke and cultivate our Magician; our creative visionary. We have great ideas for what we want in life, and we move forward with them.

Then, we realize that we need to pull back a bit; we need contemplation to balance our creative surges. We cultivate our inner High Priestess.

By the time that we’ve gotten our Magician and High Priestess going strong, we realize that we’ve been so focused on our creative vision that we’ve neglected our emotional selves. We begin to pay more attention to our inner Empress. (I call this our Isis archetype, after the Egyptian goddess of nurturance and love.)

It is only at this point – in the “archetypal evolution” scheme of things – that we invoke our Emperor. We do so because – by now – every one of our active archetypes needs him. Our Magician needs help creating a business plan and a structure that will support the creative vision. The High Priestess needs someone who is “out there” – taking care of the worldly things – so that she is safe when she calls a retreat. And the Empress?

Oh my, the Empress. She’s the one who takes on the emotional responsibilities for caretaking and nurturing, and the practical day-to-day ones as well. This can be with children. It can be with animals, particularly if someone devotes himself or herself to animal rescue or environmental care. This can be in community service or in any other way of emotional investing.

In terms of archetypal patterns, both our High Priestess and our Empress get very diffuse. They tend – by their very natures – to be ever-expanding in their awareness and attention.

For the High Priestess, this is a sort of intellectual or simply perceptive awareness. In our High Priestess modes, one thought leads to another, and to another. (When coupled with Magician moments, this leads to fabulous brainstorming.)

For the Empress, this kind of expansiveness is emotional. She winds up committing to caring for more than she can practically handle.

Between Isis and High Priestess, things can get too diffuse; too over-extended. The Magician, with his intense focus on creativity, may have let the rest of life pile up in huge, chaotic disarray.

The Emperor’s role? First, to bring in some structure and order.

He’s the one who will say: Let’s get all these names of people we’ve met (while doing all of our great networking and connecting) into a database. He’ll say: Let’s stop producing new stuff for a while, and organize our files, and back-up all our computer data. He’ll say: Let’s put together a spreadsheet of expenses, and figure out what we’ve got.

When we invoke our Emperor in a benevolent mode, he comes in as a rescuer. He brings not only structure and order, but strength and stability. He may bring some routine in to our lives – whether as regularly scheduled times for certain tasks, or as business processes that ultimately let us delegate tasks to others.

When we do a higher level of life-integration, we call on our Emperor in a more powerful and comprehensive way. We may have previously given away our power. We may have pretended to ourselves that our corporate job was secure, or that the financial system would stay stable, and our futures would be safe if we simply trusted these institutions to work in our favor.

We may have married someone, or taken in a boyfriend, or even given over a great deal of power to a more masculine business partner – and then realized that they were not there for us. They were not protecting and providing; if anything, we were providing for them!

We Recover by Invoking a Strong, Healthy, and Benevolent Emperor Inside Ourselves

As we recover, we realize that we don’t need to give away our power (and our trust, and our financial resources, and our work) to someone or something else.

We realize that we really can take care of ourselves, and we can do so in a very loving, calm, compassionate – yet very structured and disciplined manner.

This is a fairly big step in personal growth.

This goes beyond our first work in archetype integration, in which we make opposing sides work together.

In this more advanced work, we are subduing the “inner beast” (our raging fears, insecurities, and desires to simply run away – let someone else be in charge). Instead, as we gentle these fears to the ground, we invoke each of our inner archetypes as needed, and give them the full power and authority to get the job done.

If one of our tasks is to provide for our own financial well-being, then we assess what we need, calmly and deliberately. We undertake the next steps, in a way that brings our goals to fruition most solidly and steadily. We don’t look for shortcuts, and we don’t try to cut corners. We simply do what we need to do.

Inner Stillness Leads to Your Palace of Pleasure

The Pathway to Your Pleasure-Goddess Hathor Lies in Finding Your Inner Quiet Core

Are you ready to break the chains?

Are you ready to break the chains?

Are you feeling that your life is run – much too much – by your commitments and your “to-do” list?

Are you seeking to bring more pleasure into your life?

Are you actually desiring to reframe your entire life so that pleasure is at your center and your core?

In short, are you ready to start making you your own top priority? Not your job. Not your husband or significant other. Not your family (could be parents, could be the kids).

Not even fitting into your own earlier expectations for yourself.

These are ones that you may have carved out for yourself much earlier, and now find to be way too much of a straightjacket.

In short, are you ready to bust loose? To find freedom? To discover and embrace who you really are?

Welcome to the club, dearest one.

Pioneers in Pleasure

One of the strongest advocates for women finding their own pathway to pleasure these days is Regena Thomaschauer, aka Mama Gena. An early interview with her, for Glamour magazine, cited some of Mama’s suggested reading. Among these were a book by Dr. Stella Resnick, The Pleasure Zone: Why We Resist Good Feelings and How to Let Go and Be Happy.

Naturally, I did what you would do: I jumped into the book using Amazon’s Look Inside feature. And I found the most fascinating little vignette:

At that point, I felt I couldn’t just go back to my hectic life in San Francisco. It was time to confront my pain and loneliness and discover what was keeping me so unhappy. A month after my mother’s death, I moved to Mount Tremper, New York, a town int he Catskill Mountainst near Woodstock. The few people I know ther had summerhomes, and in winter they came jp only for an occasional weekend. I found a small house surrounded by woods, without a TV, and signed a lease for a year.

I spent that year in the country more alone than ever before – bht this time it was a chosen solitude. For guidance, I read Henry David Thoreau’s Walden…

At first, my days were terribly lonely. I cried a lot and felt sorry for myself. I read, wrote in my journal, and took long walks in the woods… In winter, I chopped kindling to feed the fires in the two potbellied stoves and fireplace that kept me from freezing.

What I began to discover during those endless days was how little I knew about how to be happy on a daily basis. I knew how to drive myself to succeed. I knew how to criticize myself … But I didn’t know how to take on a day and enjoy it…

Finally … I had a flash of insight… It isn’t enough to know what you are doing wrong, you have to know how to do it right…

I had no role models of happiness… I knew how to have a good time and to distract myself … with external pleasures… I could relish being admired by others and indulge myself in a material success … But I didn’t know how to get off my own case and relax, to enjoy the inner pleasures of a quiet mind and ease within my body.

So that becamse my grand revelation, what I had intuitively placed myself in exile to learn. I had not come to figure out what was wrong with me… I had come to experiment with how to do things differently. More than that, I had come to discover what was truly right with me.

One of the first actions I took was to turn all the clocks toward the wall and to tape over the clock on the stove. Even though I was completely alone, I still found myself fixated on time – what time to wake up, when to eat a meal, how much time was left in the day, and how late I was staying up. I realized I was uncomfortable with open-ended time.

It was hard at first, but I came to appreciate the freedom in the open space… When I released myself from the tyranny of time, I became more attuned to my own natural rhythms … If there was a choice … I saw how easy it was for me to be hard on myself. More and more I began to choose kindness. [pp. 7 – 10, The Pleasure Zone, by Dr. Stella Resnick]

Here we have it – one of the most essential keys to finding our true sense of inner pleasure.

It’s not necessarily the physical things – the special objects that we crave, or being pampered at a spa, or going out and having fun. These are all good, and way too often, we are pleasure-deprived.

So please – bear with me on this.

By all means, we should go for that which makes us feel good, and sometimes, that is pure, sheer fun, or physical sensation.

But there is this deeper level within ourselves, and our true sense of pleasure is embedded in this more internal core.

What Keeps Us from Our Pleasure Zone?

Dr. Resnick writes about how, at first, she had to deal with massive waves of negative self-talk. She had to penetrate these before she could find her inner self.

So very often, as soon as we start to unwrap the very tight constraints that we put on ourselves, the first thing that happens is that all of our internal self-talk gets very, very loud.

It’s hard to turn this off. Zen masters and yogis spend years in meditation, just trying to bring the internal noise level down. So should we expect it to be easy? Of course not!

But we can get through it.

Dr. Resnick got through it much like putting herself into a “mindfulness boot-camp” for a year. No distractions. No TV, no Twitter. Just herself and a lot of hard work; chopping enough wood to feed the stoves through the long winter nights.

Brutal, but effective.

Most of us won’t take a year off. (In next week’s post, though, I’ll take us through another story of a woman who did.)

What we can do is start to notice how we fill our lives with distractions in order to put a lid on the noise of our self-talk.

That’s it.

The most important thing that keeps us from having more pleasure in our lives is that our self-talk is so negative, we’d rather be under huge pressures and horrible deadlines; we’d rather listen to any banality on TV, or trace through jungles of Facebook links, that be quiet inside.

The Turning Point

The most telling point in Dr. Resnick’s story was when she turned all the clocks to the wall and taped over the clock on the stove.

Do you know what she did with this one, final, extreme act?

She called in her High Priestess archetype, in a major and extreme way.

This was an act of extreme courage.

It may not have seemed like this to her at the time. It may have seemed like the only thing that she could do – to start knowing herself aside from the superimposed mind-chatter. It may have seemed like an act of desperation – something that only the soul in its extreme state would do.

But it worked.

From this point on, she began to know herself.

This tells us something that we all need to learn.

In order to access our inner Hathor, our inner pleasure-goddess, we first need to bring an extreme interrupt-signal to our mind-chatter. This includes self-judgments and expectations, as well as the constant vying of our other archetypes (most often our inner Emperor and Magician) who insist that survival depends on action.

Who Is Our High Priestess, and How Does She Help Us?

In order to understand our inner High Priestess, it helps us to review our masculine archetypes. After all (writing to you in late September), we’ve just been through two quarters dominated by masculine “energies” – Spring (the metaphysical Season of Air), and Summer (the metaphysical Season of Fire). So, for the past six months, our studies (and sometimes our lives) have been dominated by masculine archetypes.

By definition, all of the masculine archetypes are – using the Jungian framework – very goal-oriented. Some are more so than others. Our Green Man, for instance, may set hiking to the top of the next hill as a goal. Our Magician and our Emperor, however, are extremely and dominantly goal-oriented.

Our society reinforces the value of our Magician and Emperor archetypes. Thus, not only do we have them – as “inner voices” – telling us that they and their needs are important; they should be in charge – but all the messages that we get about success and survival reinforce that we should be in Magician or Emperor modes as much as possible. (Sheryl Sandberg’s Lean In is just one such recent example.)

But if we’re focused on Leaning In, then we’re not giving ourselves permission to step back, are we?

When we Lean In, we’re putting our Amazon archetype (our bundle of the four masculine archetypes) in the forefront.

And yes, whenever we get an Amazon in the room, she tends to take over, right?

It’s much more difficult – it takes almost an extreme situation – to get our Amazon to release control, and to let our High Priestess have a moment.

Because our Amazon is a bundle of all our masculine archetypes (and we women use this sometimes just for simplicity, not for accuracy), she is – like the masculine archetypes themselves – very goal-driven.

All the masculine archetypes are Judging. They like to come to closure. They like to cross things off the list. “On schedule, on budget,” is their creed.

In contrast, our feminine archetypes are Perceiving, rather than Judging. They are by nature open-ended. One thought or connection leads to another, which leads to another.

Authors Bill and Pam Farrell expresses this by saying, Men Are Like Waffles, Women Are Like Spaghetti. (See the Farrell’s Men Are Like Waffles, Women Are Like Spaghetti YouTube vid, and for an absolutely hilarious vid on this subject, click on What Attracts Men the Most About Women.

The masculine archetypes tend to focus in.

The feminine archetypes tend to expand out.

When we invoke a feminine archetype – in any form – our minds go into Perceiving mode. Our thoughts spread outward like ripples on an a lake.

If we’re in Empress mode (and we will be, in just five more weeks), we think about people and animals and their needs. Thoughts about one person lead to thoughts about another. Our lives fill up with caretaking and nurturing.

When we’re in Hestia mode (a less feeling, and more thinking, mode), our thoughts are about maintaining our homes. One task or chore leads to the next. “A woman’s work is never done.” It’s not so much that we’re task or closure-driven, it’s that one small task leads to the next, which leads to the next one.

When we’re in pleasure-seeking Hathor mode (as is our desire right now; we’re getting there), one pleasure opens the door for the next.

When we’re in High Priestess mode – if we’re successful in shutting down our internal noise – we have a more diffuse awareness that extends out from ourselves. We don’t try to chase down thoughts. Instead, we begin to notice what emerges from within.

And this becomes our real source of pleasure. We begin to notice that which truly speaks to us.

As expressed in the Latin American folksong Guantanamera,

The little streams of the mountains
Please me more than the sea

Men as well as women need to invoke their High Priestess, and they do. (Read a lovely interview with William O’Shaughnessy, who reflects on that line from Guantanamera.)

Taking This Home

So – the abstract concepts of Hathor and High Priestess – what do they mean to us in our day-to-day lives?

Starting now, and for the coming six months, we’re exploring our feminine archetypes. Right now, we’re entering into our Hathor mode – we’re opening ourselves to pleasure, in all its forms.

Soon, just in time for Thanksgiving and the Christmas/Hanukah/Solstice holidays, we’ll be focusing on nurturing those who are close to us – and even extending love and kindness to strangers. This will be our Empress time.

With holiday festivities over, we go into the deeper, quieter, and most introspective time of the year – our High Priestess time. And just as we feel like moving about again, we’ll engage our inner Hestia – goddess of hearth and home – as we start spring cleaning.

We don’t have to wait until January to invoke our High Priestess, though. Not when we need her tranquil presence to help us discern that which we truly desire, versus that which we feel we should desire.

Thus, as we seek the pathway to pleasure in our lives, we can begin with High Priestess-type actions.

We can go for a walk. (Julie Cameron describes this as an Artist’s Walk in her book, The Vein of Gold.)

We can journal. (Julia refers to this as writing down our Morning Pages in The Artist’s Way.)

We can pull out magazine-images of things that inspire us – or even strike our fancy – and put them into a box, or even get fancy and put them into sheet protectors in a three-ring binder, or make a collage.

The weather is going to be beautiful, darlings!

The summer’s heat has been cooling off. The colors are vibrant. The farmer’s markets are showing the best of late-summer harvests; flowers and luscious fruits and veggies.

Why not make a sensual adventure this weekend of going to a farmer’s market, tasting wonderful samples, and bringing home something for a special meal?

Enjoy it either outside (if it’s a sunny, warm day), or set a table for yourself (and perhaps some special others) near a window where you can see the best that early autumn has to offer.


Much love to you, darling, as we learn to bring more pleasure into our lives!


Alay'nya, author of Unveiling: The Inner Journey.

Alay’nya, author of Unveiling: The Inner Journey.

To your own health, wealth, success, and overall well-being –

Alay’nya (Alianna J. Maren, Ph.D.)
Author of Unveiling: The Inner Journey
You are the Jewel in the Heart of the Lotus. Become the Jewel!

Check out Alay’nya’s YouTube Channel
Connect with Alay’nya on Facebook
Follow Unveiling: The Inner Journey on Facebook


Unveiling, by Alay'nya, currently has an overall five-star Amazon rating.

Unveiling, by Alay’nya, currently has an overall five-star Amazon rating.

This blog series develops themes originally published in Unveiling: The Inner Journey, published by Mourning Dove Press.

Unveiling currently has twenty 5-star Amazon reviews, and has been recommended by luminaries:

  • Dr. Christiane Northrup – “This book is delightful”
  • Midwest Book Review, in Bethany’s Books – reviews by Susan Bethany – “highly recommended”
  • Nizana al Rassan, writing for (the now out of circulation) iShimmy.com – “a fascinating read with so much wisdom and solid advice.”

 

 


Unveiling, by Alay'nya, currently has an overall five-star Amazon rating.

Unveiling, by Alay’nya, currently has an overall five-star Amazon rating.

This blog series develops themes originally published in Unveiling: The Inner Journey, published by Mourning Dove Press.

Unveiling currently has twenty 5-star Amazon reviews, and has been recommended by luminaries:

  • Dr. Christiane Northrup – “This book is delightful”
  • Midwest Book Review, in Bethany’s Books – reviews by Susan Bethany – “highly recommended”
  • Nizana al Rassan, writing for (the now out of circulation) iShimmy.com – “a fascinating read with so much wisdom and solid advice.”

 

 



P.S. What can you read that will help you understand yourself more?

Dr. Stella Resnick

The Pleasure Zone by Dr. Stella Resnick

Paper

Kindle


Unveiling: The Inner Journey

Learn how you can bring more pleasure into your life starting in Part V of Unveiling: The Inner Journey.

 

Paper

Kindle

 


Copyright (c) 2013, Alay’nya (Alianna J. Maren, Ph.D.). All rights reserved.


Related Posts: Hathor – Leading Up to This Point

Related Posts: The High Priestess – and how she relates to Hathor

Related Posts from the Alay’nya Studio Blog: Expressing Your Inner Hathor through movement and dance

The Magical Turning Point – And What It Means for You

Hathor – Goddess of Love, Pleasure, Beauty, Sensuality, and Romance – Emerges This Week!

A water garden soothes our spirit and our senses.

A water garden soothes our spirit and our senses.

Have you been longing to bring more lushness into your life?

Do you desire sensuality, opulence, lusciousness to ooze from your every pore?

Have you been working so hard that your inner self has felt sterile and neglected?

It’s Not You; It’s Your Masculine Power Archetypes

Let’s play – just for a moment – with the notion that there may be something to this archetypal stuff after all.

Four metaphysical elements describe the four seasons of the year.

Four metaphysical elements describe the four seasons of the year.

For the past six months, we’ve been under the dominion of two masculine elemens: Air and Fire.

With the Vernal Equinox, six months ago in March, the element of Air took over in our lives, and ushered in the two most powerful (and power-focused) masculine archetypes: our visionary and creative Magician, and our sustaining and stabilizing Emperor.

These two archetypes can sometimes work in tandem, although they have different agendas. Often, successful businesses are built around a creative Magician/Emperor partnership.

When summer came, the influence of these two archetypes eased, and two new – although still very masculine – archetypes emerged: our inner Green Man and our Hierophant. Our Green Man, coming right after Summer Solstice, embodies our desire to join with nature. It makes sense that he is dominant just then – during the time that we are most likely to schedule vacations.

Professor Dumbledore welcomes students back to the academic year at Hogwarts.

Professor Dumbledore welcomes students back to the academic year at Hogwarts.

Our Hierophant is our “back-to-school” archetype. He’s our Yoda; our Obi-wan Kenobi. He’s our Mr. Miyagi, telling us to “Wax on, wax off.” He’s our internal Professor Dumbledore, welcoming us back for the school year.

Our Hierophant officially emerged at Lammas (August 1st), and will reign through the remainder of this week (through September 21st).

Our Hierophant has one of the most important jobs within our inner psyche.

Yes, he embodies our inner mentor, guru, and guide. He’s the one who helps us take on the necessary self-discipline to master our inner selves. And of course, any time that we mentor someone else, we’re invoking our inner Hierophant.

But there’s one more thing that our Hierophant does.

He both protects and shelters our inner Hathor (who is as delicate and fragile as a newly-budded rose), and he gives her structure and boundaries. He both helps create the play-time for her (and holds the bounds fast against our other archetypes who want to gobble up her time), and yet keeps her from raging into temper tantrums and turning over all the apple carts in sight.

Our Inner Hathor: Wild, Willful, and Wonderful

Hathor (left) welcomes the Egyptian queen Nefertari (right) to the afterlife.

Hathor (left) welcomes the Egyptian queen Nefertari (right) to the afterlife. Image taken from an excellent ‘virtual tour’ of Nefertari’s tomb, led by ‘tour guide’ Professor Peter Schmidt of Swarthmore College.

Our inner Hathor is a lovely creature. And she, herself, is all about love.

But she is a bit on the wild and carefree side.

Just like a precocious teenager, who wants what she wants when she wants it – no matter how good (or how bad) it is for her – our Hathor is willful and bold. She wants her own way.

And way too often, we feel that we have to slight her and shut her down, simply because of survival concerns.

I’m not sure which of these is worse: Our survival-angst (all too often based on all-too-real concerns), or the power-mongering amongst our other (typically Magician/Emperor) core power archetypes that simply want to take our Hathor time – simply because they want it. Because it’s a resource, and they each want every resource that they can get.

This leads to: Power struggles.

The Biggest Power Struggles are Inside Ourselves

Power wars more dominant inside ourselves than they are on any Board of Directors, for any company in the world.

The reason?

Each internal archetype is like a person, all in itself. Each wants what he or she thinks or feels is best. Each wants to set the agenda.

The end result? We have huge internal struggles going on about the basics of our life. Do we spend the weekend on a project that will advance our creative passion or our career (Magician or Emperor), or are we going off camping? (That would be our Green Man, wanting to make a break for freedom.)

The Real Challenge

The real challenge that we face – especially as women – is that our core feminine archetypes are valued less by society than are our masculine ones.

Straightforward, isn’t it?

Masculine roles – involving creative outputs, legendary accomplishments, and forming business empires – are given attention, money, and reward by society.

In contrast, as a culture, we give less attention to the feminine roles of nurturance (Empress), introspection (High Priestess), creating a calm, peaceful and orderly environment (Hestia), and – of course – passion and play (Hathor).

To a very large extent, we’ve each internalized social values.

Add to that, it is often our masculine expression that pays the bills. That is, our masculine roles – more often than not – give us survival. (There are exceptions; some of us make our living through nurturing others; some of us live a life devoted to contemplation and prayer, and some of us are professional housekeepers or are in professional support roles. But these livelihoods – while real – make far less money than do the more masculine-oriented roles.)

The Most Pivotal Time of the Year

We’re now at the time when our Hathor is coming out to play.

For us to successfully create Hathor-time requires (surprise!) the discipline, clarity, and focus of our masculine archetypes – most especially our Hierophant.

We’re going to call on him to create boundaries; boundaries that will protect and cherish and value our inner Hathor.

Think of our Hierophant as a wise old gardener. He sees and loves a truly special rose.

This rose can’t be moved; she is deeply rooted in where she is. She is exquisite, but delicate and fragile.

Our Hierophant protects our Hathor archetype by creating boundaries that give her safe enclosure - her own Secret Garden.

Our Hierophant protects our inner Hathor by creating boundaries that give her safe enclosure – her own . Photo by Eileen Porterfield.

How will he protect her?

He builds a wall around her. He builds her her very own secret garden.

He creates structures to protect her from harsh winds.

He ensures that she’s fed and watered and tended on a regular basis.

For us to cultivate our own inner Hathor, we also have to be our own Hierophant-Gardener. We have to take on creating time, space, and attention for her. We have to give her permission to come out. We have to give her encouragement to flourish and play.

This is one of the most important tasks in our growth as full and complete human beings.

Much love to you, darling, as we enter this season of pleasure together!


Alay'nya, author of Unveiling: The Inner Journey.

Alay’nya, author of Unveiling: The Inner Journey.

To your own health, wealth, success, and overall well-being –

Alay’nya (Alianna J. Maren, Ph.D.)
Author of Unveiling: The Inner Journey
You are the Jewel in the Heart of the Lotus. Become the Jewel!

Check out Alay’nya’s YouTube Channel
Connect with Alay’nya on Facebook
Follow Unveiling: The Inner Journey on Facebook


Unveiling, by Alay'nya, currently has an overall five-star Amazon rating.

Unveiling, by Alay’nya, currently has an overall five-star Amazon rating.

This blog series develops themes originally published in Unveiling: The Inner Journey, published by Mourning Dove Press.

Unveiling currently has twenty 5-star Amazon reviews, and has been recommended by luminaries:

  • Dr. Christiane Northrup – “This book is delightful”
  • Midwest Book Review, in Bethany’s Books – reviews by Susan Bethany – “highly recommended”
  • Nizana al Rassan, writing for (the now out of circulation) iShimmy.com – “a fascinating read with so much wisdom and solid advice.”

P.S. What can you read that will help you understand yourself more?

Julie Marie Rahm, America’s Mindset Mechanic

Check out Julie Marie Rahm!

Julie Marie Rahm, America’s Mindset Mechanic and author of Handle Everything: Eight Tools You Need to Live Well and Prosper and also Military Kids Speak (great for parents, teachers, and coaches of military kids) uses a great technique that can help you clear energy blockages, ranging from those from this life through the influence of your ancestral karma. Connect with Julie at info (at) americasmindsetmechanic (dot) com to learn more about how she can help you.

Books by Julie Marie Rahm, America’s Mindset Mechanic

Kindle

Kindle


Julie Marie Rahm, aka America’s Mindset Mechanic on Unveiling: The Inner Journey

What does Julie Rahm, America’s Mindset Mechanic and author of Handle Everything: Eight Tools You Need to Live Well and Prosper have to say about Unveiling: The Inner Journey?

Julie writes:

[In Unveiling: The Inner Journey,] Alay’nya takes readers on an adventure of the body, mind, and spirit from the inside out, strengthening each independently from the other and aligning all three in support of each other. And then, the adventure continues as readers learn how to create the physical environment that supports and reflects the body, mind and spirit, from personal style to the home and office. Each chapter finishes with Personal Pathworking exercises. When readers choose to stop and do the exercises, opportunities for instant positive changes result.

Read this and more reviews of Unveiling: The Inner Journey.

 

Paper

Kindle

 


Copyright (c) 2013, Alay’nya (Alianna J. Maren, Ph.D.). All rights reserved.


Related Posts: Hathor – Leading Up to This Point

Related Posts: HierophantHathor’s Protector

Dethroning the "Emperor"

Dethroning Our Inner Emperor – And Freeing Ourselves from Archetypal Dominance

The function of Emperors is to create empires.

That’s simple, isn’t it?

Their role in life – both as “external emperors” (in the “real world” of current events and history) and as “internal emperors” (our Emperor archetype) – is to create, build, and sustain empires. Their intent is to grow their empires, by whatever means possible. And to ensure that their empires “reign supreme” over all others.


Ghenghis Khan, creator and ruler of the Mongol empire, 1155-1227 AD

Think of some of the greatest Emperors that the world has known. Alexander the Great and Ghenghis Khan easily come to mind. Each of these built armies, waged war, and created empires that were – at that time – among the largest that the world has ever seen.

Successful emperors (those who build the largest and most solid empires) typically have not only an intense, committed, and long-term focus on empire-building, but also pursue their aims (as in the case of Genghis Khan) with “a combination of outstanding military tactics and merciless brutality.”

The relevance of all of this to ourselves, we might ask?

We might have various Emperor-personas in our lives. A boss or co-worker who is unapologetically ambitious. Someone in a non-profit who uses every opportunity to get the spotlight on him or herself. Even a much-loved – albeit feared – family matriarch. All of these are Emperors in their own right.

We treat these people with due deference and respect – and typically, give them as wide a berth as possible. Most of the time, we find it easier to avoid these people, to simply “not deal” – because we know that they are more focused, cunning, and downright more driven than we will ever be.

But truly, it’s not these “external emperors” that we need to worry about.

Our real concern should properly be with the Emperor that lurks inside each of us. In fact, the one that runs almost all aspects of our lives.

This is the Emperor that ruthless and merciless – to ourselves!

This is the Emperor that drives us to work until our health breaks; to ignore our own inner desperate pleadings for time for rest, for pleasure, for connection, for even a walk outside on a lovely spring day. This is the Emperor who chooses a life path of success, power, recognition, control – all, ultimately, based on ego.

We may think that we’ve managed to elude the controlling grasp of our inner Emperor – and some of us have. However, a lack of worldly success does not always mean that our inner Emperor is dormant or absent. Rather, it can just as easily mean that we have enough internal conflict so that our Emperor can push us to great extents – but is constantly being hampered by internal “palace revolts.”

So how do we discern our Emperor? And then, how do we “overthrow” him?

Even more, is “overthrowing” our Emperor what we really want? Or is there a way to “manage” our own internal Emperor, so that we are getting the “best out of the deal”?

Common sense, and a dose of practical wisdom, suggests that complete “dethronement” may not be entirely what we want.

We wouldn’t have such a powerful inner archetype as our Emperor if it (“he”) were not extremely useful.

What we’re desiring, though, is not just a sense of balance, but really something more.

Our Emperor comes from ego. And ultimately, our ego is fear-driven.

Our real goal is to live beyond our egos; to live according to a higher vision and sense of purpose. We design to align ourselves more with God’s will in our lives. This means changing our internal “power structure” somewhat.


Walt Kelly first used the quote “We Have Met The Enemy and He Is Us” on a poster for Earth Day in 1970.

There’s that well-known saying; “We have met the enemy, and he is us.”

Well, that “us” would be our own internal Emperor – the most powerful, determined, focused, and controlling of our six core power archetypes.

So how do we discern him? And how do we “dethrone” him? (That means – not remove completely, but get him into a useful and somewhat “subordinate” place?) That will be the subject of the next few blogs.

Yours with love –

Alay’nya

Is Your "Emperor" Ruling Your Life?

Is Your Inner Emperor Ruling Your Life? (And If So, What Can You Do?)

A gentle tyrant.

Perhaps, sometimes, even not-so-gentle.


Matthias, Holy Roman Emperor (1557-1619), painted by Hans von Aachen (1625).

We each have an inner Emperor.

Our Emperor mode, or archetype, is our “Project Manager” self. When we deal with cognitive, rational, “get-things-done” types of tasks – tasks often involving budgets, deadlines, and deliverables – we call on our inner Emperor.

Our inner Emperor is one of our six core power archetypes, and is often dominant. He (along with is compatriot, the Magician) tends to be a “resource hog.”

We can’t blame him; not really. Any good Project Manager, CEO, or President-of-Anything will charm, co-opt, or just plain commandeer any and every resource that he (or she) can find to get the job done. That’s why they’re paid the “big bucks.” They get things done – and to hell with whose toes get stepped on in the process.

Our Emperor is all about – whatever he’s “all about.” This could be getting a law degree or a promotion at work. It could simply be getting a five-year-old’s birthday party to come off successfully. Regardless, our inner Emperor is highly task-focused. And because “his” role is to get things done, at all costs, when he’s in charge, no other archetypal mode gets much attention.

Our inner High Priestess wants to go for a walk, or even to get out of town for the weekend to simply chill? Sorry, but we’re staying late at the office until the report is done.

Our inner Hathor wants some spa time? Later.

Our inner Empress wants to connect with girlfriends, or stay at home and cuddle? Again, later. Her needs get deferred in the face of the Emperor’s overwhelming (perhaps even obsessive) task-focused nature.

Now don’t get me wrong. We need our Emperor mode. This aspect of our psyche is essential to our well-being.

The challenge is that – for too many of us – we’ve allowed our inner Emperor to really become an inner Tyrant – gobbling up all of our time, all of our resources, and all of our energies. And then we find ourselves exhausted, frustrated, and just downright depressed and angry.

So how do we deal?

That will be the subject of the next several postings.

References

Soloman, Presidential Address to the Eastern Psychological Association, NYC, April, 1963.

"Holographic Archetypes" – Experiencing ALL of Your Archetypal Journey At the Same Time

The “Holographic Archetype” – Why You Seem to Be Experiencing Everything All at Once

“Life,” we sometimes think to ourselves, “is supposed to be simple.” And all too often, it isn’t. Especially for those of us who are trying to do some “personal growth work” while still carrying on some semblance of normalcy; jobs, family, school, community involvement and friends. In the midst of all of this (sometimes), we’re carrying on with the rather difficult business of discovering and accessing/integrating our various “core power archetypes.”

Our inner work is powerful. And as we dive into it, we can go through some very unsettling times. By analogy, let’s imagine what would happen if we had a company that had a succesion of CEO’s, each having a different dominant archetype.

As we know from any shakeup at the executive level in a company, when we start moving key figures around, things are (temporarily) unstable. If our company has formerly been headed by an entrepreneur/inventor (Magician archetype), and the Board of Directors decides that the time has come to put someone in whose background is in running a “tight ship,” or who is formerly a CFO, we know that everything changes. (Switching from a Magician in charge to an Emperor in charge.) And there would be even bigger shake-ups if the Board put in charge someone who is focused on mentoring and developing “leaders from within.” (Hierophants love to mentor!)

Imagine, further, the absolute chaos that would erupt if any of the other “core archetypes” were to be calling the shots for a while. If it were an Empress persona, the company would be all about “relating.” We’d be hugging our clients a lot; but the eye would not quite be on profits and deliverables. (However, our clients might start placing bigger orders and referring their friends to us. Who knows?)

And if a Hathor-type were running the show, it would be all about parties and having a good time! (The High Priestess, wisely, would recluse herself from all considerations of corporate leadership. If she had to take this role, though, the first thing she’d do would be to declare a nine-day corporate retreat in the Catskills. Lots of walking the footpaths in silent meditation. Then she’d happily foist this job off on the first qualified Emperor.)

Now that’s the simple version.

Really.

In real life, for most of us doing this kind of archetypal integration, our inner landscape is about as comfortable as frequent shifts in corporate leadership. That is to say, highly uncomfortable – especially when the various archetypes that we’ve finally accessed begin to assert themselves. Each one wants to “run the ship” – at least for a while!

And as I said, that’s the simple version. This version presumes that we’re doing our archetypal access and integration in a calm, linear, and “safe” manner. This was, in fact, the “curriculum” a few thousand years ago, when the Kabbalah was first discovered or understood. Back then, a certain sense of orderliness was assumed.

Now, however, all bets are off. Our world is highly chaotic and nonlinear. Our lives often are, as well. Instead of picking up our archetypes one at at time, and then doing our archetypal integration under the careful watch of a renowned integration master, we are often attempting this on our own. What advice and mentoring we get often comes from books, weekend workshops, and “life coaches.” (These latter may or may not have done their own integration work. They may or may not even know what you’d be talking about – that is, in a real, substantive, and useful sense.)

So here we are, many of us, attempting to do the very rough-and-tumble work of archetype access and integration, all too often on our own. And to make it much more challenging, in the REAL “real world,” we’re often dealing with several emerging archetypes all at once.

Imagine a boardroom war in which various key players are vying for control. In the morning, the Emperor takes control, sets up the goals, objectives, deliverables, and timelines. All seems straightforward and doable. The goals may be stringent, but you know how to pour on the overtime. You can work evenings and weekends; you’ve done it before. (Many times, no doubt.) So you gear up, and mentally factor in the vacation that you’ll take when bonuses are announced.

Then, around noon, Hathor seizes control. She wants that vacation now! You count up accrued vacation days, visit your favorite travel site, and figure out which weekend you can afford to extend to a three-dayer. No sooner have you made your plans and submitted a vacation request when whammo! The High Priestess emerges. And what she really wants is quiet time, because, lo and behold! She’s paving the way for the Magician to emerge with his next great invention!

This is what the archetypal integration journey is all about. It’s not all that poetic. In fact, it’s downright messy.

And now – adding in more “real world” factors – there are at least two major integration processes. The first is when you’ve accessed all your core power archetypes. Everyone is “present and/or accounted for, Sir!” You (the cognitive, dominant “you-in-charge”) can access each one as appropriate and at will. You know when to charm, and when to command. You know when to take some time off to connect with nature and your “quiet mind,” and you know when to party. And you also know when to get the “deliverables” delivered. On budget, and on time.

You’ve mastered your game.

Or so you think.

It’s the second integration process that comes up as a surprise, and is much more disorienting. It’s more than the various key executives in a company taking on leadership roles. It’s a lot more like when the Board decides that the company is going to go in a whole different direction. Instead of being a “service company,” focusing on government (or commercial) contracts, you’re going to be “product company.” And the word comes down – new divisions are created, people are laid off while the company retools and regroups, new people come into newly created power positions. This is hugely destabilizing.

And necessary.

Just as companies must reform – sometimes very radically – we also need to rework ourselves from the inside out. Sometimes very radically.

You’ve heard about this. Someone who has made a living in the banking world leaves their job – their whole career – to become a baker. A successful business leader leaves his or her company to teach in an inner city school. Huge life-changes like this do happen; they happen all the time. But they don’t just come up out of the blue; there’s a lot that goes on behind the scenes before such an overt change happens.

Not all of us will switch careers, of course. But as we go through this second integration, we learn to pay much more attention to the needs, wants, and desires of core archetypes whom we may have repressed for many years. It’s similar, in a sense, to the case in which a wife finally does leave a husband who’s never really had time for her. After all the years that she’s accomodated, she’s finally decided that she can’t deny her own self anymore. What a shock that is for everyone!

Then, of course, the husband has to woo and win her back. And finally, for perhaps the first time, he starts listening, paying attention, and allocating some real time to her; to her wants, needs, and desires. And for a good long while, he won’t be putting in any overtime. In fact, what he might do is put in for a leave-of-absence or a sabbatical, in order to discover just who his wife really is. It’s that, or the divorce court.

If we’ve similarly been Emperor-dominant all of our lives, there comes a time when we need to give some “quality time” to the other core power archetyps. Otherwise, they’ll simply desert us. (Usually, this comes at a huge cost. Pay now, or pay later.)

Now, there’s a reason that all these archetypal integration processes are coming up at once for many of us. It’s not just that we’re going through “changing times.” We are, of course, but that’s not the whole story.

It’s not just that we’re in a massively accelerated world. Yes, that’s also true. And again, it’s not the whole story.

It’s much more that we – as a species – as a whole planetary species (and perhaps even as a planet) – are undergoing this kind of archetypal journey at a mega-level. We’re not just doing archetypal integration individually; we’re doing this as a society.

Moreover, steps like these are broad-ranging; they pull in all other aspects of our archetypal journeys. It’s like living inside a kaliedoscope. Or, more appropriately, experiencing our lives as a hologram.

More on this in the next blog posting.

Our "Hierophant" – Mentor, Protector, and Guide for Our Love-Goddess "Hathor"

Our Hierophant’s Most Important Role: Championing our Love-Goddess Hathor

My work with A Course in Miracles is really kicking up a storm. I feel as though there’s a whirlwind going on inside me. All the “internal dynamics” that I’ve ever had are massively active, and it feels as though I’m living inside a tornado.

Grounding things help. These include the physical hard work of cleaning; especially deep-cleaning – the sort that involves moving furniture and getting behind things. Gardening helps – slowing down and working with plants. Cooking also works. Anything that keeps my body moving and is not overly demanding of either fine motor-skills or a great deal of cognitive attention. (Does this explain why I haven’t updated my database in over ten days, despite meeting lots of interesting new people at recent events? Cognitive storm.)

With all this inner “churn” going on, I’m noticing the interplays – the dynamics – between my archetypes more than ever. And I’m amazed (sometimes shocked and horrified) to see how these same dynamics are playing out in the lives of people around me. Apparently, many of us are dealing with the same things. It’s just that most of us don’t know it.

The biggest challenge that I’m facing is in learning to love myself more. That means finding and loving the “real” me – not the “superficial” me – or the construct that I put together many years ago. The “real” me is artistic, sensual, and emotionally expressive. The “cover story” is that of being an intellectual, and even a businesswoman.

Now to some extent, the “cover story” is real. But it’s not real if I take it to be all of who I am.

There’s history behind this; for myself, and (I suspect) for almost everyone whom I meet. In my case, I did a form of “psychic amputation” when I was twelve years old. I decided – for a number of reasons that came together all at once – that being who I “really was” was not a safe place to be. That is, being in my expressive, feminine, sensual core was not safe. And I don’t mean physically; I was in no danger of physical harm whatsoever. This was all an emotional interpretation.

So instead of developing my artistic and sensual aspects, I sort of “lopped” that part off, and went into masculine-themed pursuits. I studied math, science, and martial arts. I tried to put a damper on my emotional expressiveness, and simply not to feel. (Hah! That was certainly not successful. Suppression never is.)

Be as it may, a lot of other life-decisions came out of this. Some good, and many not-so-good.

And over the past twenty or thirty years I’ve kept seeking to reconnect with, and to rekindle, my artistic/expressive aspects – with at best partial success.

This has resulted in a sort of “archetypal war” going on inside.

My Emperor is (as with many expressive women) my least “favorite” archetype. As I was explaining it to a friend two days ago, our Emperor builds empires. He’s all about structure and control.

My Hathor wants to come out and play. She’s the one who wants to do “kid-art.” Everyone has a Hathor, and each of our Hathors are a bit different – but this is where are inner “party girl” resides.

In fact, our Hathor really is our “inner child.”

So imagine what it’s like if we have a rather sour and dour middle-aged man running the show, insisting that life be lived in a framework of timelines and deliverables, and there’s a very active, imaginative, willful little girl that wants to divert all the attention.

Yup. That’s exactly what it feels like.

So how do we make our own inner breakthroughs?

It sure isn’t easy. I’ve been chipping away at this for years and years, and right now – even though a really big change could be underway – it feels like a maelstrom let loose. Just a “word of warning” for others who take on this process.

But in terms of dynamics: Our Hathor needs the structure and boundaries and guidance that one of our masculine archetypes provides. She needs this precisely so that she can run free and play. She is “safe” simply because someone else (one of our masculine archetypes) has taken on creating and protecting the “play zone.”

You wouldn’t just drop a wild and willful child off in an unknown area, would you? You’d make sure that there was a responsible, capable adult nearby. Not so much for supervision, but for protection.

The interesting thing is: the masculine archetype that fulfills this role is not our inner Emperor. He simply can’t. He’s all about building an empire. Creating and monitoring a play-space for a wild, expressive, sensual, fun-loving art-child is something that he’s just not capable of doing.

But our Hierophant is absolutely right for this job.

Our Hierophant, like our other “core” masculine power archetypes, is very focused on completing goals and getting to the “end-game.” However, unlike our two other primary male archetypes (Emperor and Magician), he is Feeling rather than Thinking. That means that he is strongly driven to connect with others, and that he (like our Empress) is governed by the feel-good sensation that comes from oxytocin release. This means bonding and connection.

Our Hierophant functions best when he can direct a student towards a “high goal.” Remember, our Hierophant is our own inner Obi-wan Kenobi; our own Yoda, our own Professor Dumbledore, and our own Mr. Miyagi. He lives to bring the student to a new level of mastery.

And our Hathor is not particularly concerned with mastery, so there’s a little dissonance in their interests.

However, of all our masculine archetypes, our Hierophant is most concerned with the true happiness and well-being of others. In other words, if we had to pick from our set of masculine archetypes the one who would be the best “baby-sitter” for a highly creative, expressive, and willful girl-child, it would not be our Magician. Our Magician will not take time away from his creative vision to be open-ended and playful.

Nor would it be our Emperor. He’d just want to put our Hathor off in a corner someplace, tell her to play quietly with her dolls, and don’t disturb him while he’s running the kingdom.

But the Hierophant? Now there’s a chance.

Our Hierophant is most likely to not only care about and be interested in our Hathor, but also to be fascinated by her.

If a man finds his soul-completion when he “lives to serve his Queen,” then our Hierophant (think of a wise older man, a grandfatherly sort) finds his true completion in nurturing Hathor.

Imagine a very kind, wise, and loving grandfather who absolutely adores and dotes on his grandaughter. He is endlessly fascinated with her. He’ll do whatever is in his power to schedule play-dates with her; to take her places where she can have fun (but safe) new experiences.

Of all our masculine archetypes, he’s the one to not only look out for her, but to be her advocate in “time-splicing” how we spend our days.

When our Hathor is deprived for too long, she stages a hissy fit. A good old-fashioned temper tantrum.

But that’s not the best way to keep our inner “selves” in order. Having our Hierophant negotiate up-front the playtime for his darling and wonderful Hathor is a useful strategy – if we can simply get to this place in our lives.

This archetypal integration process is not all that easy. And it’s something that we re-do and relearn, again and again. But each time, we add in a bit more of our wholeness and fullness.

If we can survive the maelstrom.

Hathor or Hierophant – Who’s On Top?

Power Struggles Within Our Own Internal Archetypes – and Helping Our Love-Goddess Hathor to Win!

Have you ever wanted to make a life-change? I’m not just talking a cosmetic make-over. Not even a full-out, change-my-hair, change-my-wardrobe, change-my-life kind of life-change. Not even a get-a-new-job, get-a-new-boyfriend, move-across-country change.

I mean radical.

I mean a change that comes from inside, that router-roots out all our “icky-stuff” from the inside out. Something that is transformative. Something that is enduring. Something that sticks.

And oh, yes. By-the-way. Something that makes us so much happier.

Well, you’ve wanted this, I’m sure. And I’ve wanted it as well. In fact, that’s why I wrote the book, Unveiling: The Inner Journey.

Writing Unveiling, and even getting it published, and sharing it with you, has by no means been the culmination of my own Inner Journey. A waypoint, most certainly. Having enough “stuff” together to be useful to you – to give you a concise guide and reference; well, that too. (If 544 pages can be considered “concise.”)

But the truth is, as soon as I got Unveiling finished, I began going deeper into my own Inner Journey. I began to get more insights – and have incorporated many of them into my blogposts over the past six months.

But still, during all this time, I was desiring – craving – a deeper level of personal transformation.

And over the past few days, almost overnight, I’ve reached a new milestone. Had a breakthrough. And I want to share this with you.

A quick bit of background.

If you’ve been following this blog for the past six months, you’ve been learning about each of our six core power archetypes in detail. (A bit randomly, but with at least a little attention to most of them.) You’ve also been learning why and how each of these is important.

And here’s something important: You and I are not alone in our Inner Journeys. We’re desiring happiness. We’re desiring to know and bring to fullness ALL of who we are. And we’re desiring to fulfill – for each of us – our true “meaning in life.”

And the word is: People – people like you and me – have been wanting this throughout time. And those who have accomplished this are those whom we regard as Master Teachers.

The truth is; these Masters really do exist, and various ones have existed throughout time. And – a very long time ago – certain ones either discerned or had “given” to them the Kabbalah, which essentially is a guide to life-mastery. It’s a roadmap to the cosmos – and also to the core of our being. And over the years, the teachings of the Kabbalah were used to create the Major Arcana.

Where this relates to us is that the first seven Major Arcana Cards depict exactly this Quest for personal happiness and integration. (At least, the first stage. There are two others beyond this – for a different day.)

At first glance, the equation seems really simple. Master (access and cultivate) each of our six core power archetypes, and integrate these archetypes (be able to use them at will), and we’ll have each achieved the first level of Life-Mastery. We will each be the Master of our Fate. The Captain of our own Ship.

And, of course, somewhere along the way – our “ship will have come in.”

If it’s that easy, then where’s the problem?

Well, it’s simple. (And it’s not.)

Our inner archetypes are very real, and very powerful. Each is strong-minded, purposeful, and willful. And they each should be. We don’t want any wussies in there!

The challenge is that occasionally (more likely, way too often), the wrong archetypes get to “pull the strings.”

Let’s be clear about this.

Each archetype is very useful. Vital, in fact. We can’t do without a single one. (For a quick review, go to Your Six Power Archetypes – What Happens When One Doesn’t Function? and Mastering the Power Archetypes – Essential for CEOs and Strategic Leaders.

So to be clear – we need our masculine core archetypes. We need our Magician, for vision and inspiration. (Sometimes, our Magician keeps us up all night – writing that play, coming up with a new business venture.) We need our Hierophant, who teaches others. (This is our own, internal Obi-wan Kenobi, our own Professor Dumbledore.) And oh-my-God, we need our Emperor. Our Emperor gets the projects done on time, the groceries bought and put away, and the bills paid.

The challenge is: these three masculine archetypes tend to pull “power-plays” inside our heads, just as they do in much of the world around us. And the real challenge – the real stumbling block for many of us – is that, over time, we tend to believe them.

Let me back up a bit. Bear with me, this is important. This is one of the most important things you’ll ever get in this blogpost series.

There are certain times in our lives when we hit a crisis. A certain kind of crisis. This is the kind of crisis that happens when we’ve been in one of our feminine archetypes for a while, and totally revelling in it, loving being in that state, and just rejoicing in the juiciness, the flowingness, the freedom. Examples are: being in love. Giving ourselves lots of time for artistic creativity and play. Feeling very emotionally connected with others.

And then something happens that we perceive as a life-threat. And we react by pivoting into one of our masculine archetypes. Very often, we move into Emperor. We “rule” ourselves with harsh authority. The only things that we value, in this mode, are a form of hyper-masculinity – almost a caricature of the masculine. So we will spend enormous hours at work, but somehow not ever get ourselves the perks or rewards that come to our male colleagues. We’ll find reasons to not go on vacation. (If you’re familiar with Jung’s concept of the animus, this is it. This is an animus-in-charge type of living.)

And there’s something that we do that’s even worse, that’s even more self-defeating. Once we give (any or all of) our masculine archetype(s) power in our life, they tend to keep control. And “they” tend to make decisions that get us “locked into” the mode where they stay in control.

An example? One very brilliant businesswoman whom I know. Fabulously effective. Hard-working. Absolutely the first person with whom I’d “do a deal.” But she has confessed to me – more than once – that in her “heart of hearts,” she longs to do fashion design. She started out there, but somewhere along the way, took a detour. She recently bought a wonderful new set of dressy day clothes – really a whole new “wardrobe look” – at a very high price. Paying off this expensive set of clothes partially satisfies her need to create her personal aesthetic. However, it also forces her to stay in her Emperor-dominant job. She now has far less “wiggle room” for exploring a different career. Many, many little decisions like this add up. Her Emperor now controls her life.

(Quick – and important – little digression. There are times when we are on a Heroic Quest – an important life-journey. Getting an advanced degree. Starting a new business. Heavens, even writing a book! During these times, we must remain very diligent, and true to our Quest. But Quests are transitions. They lead us from one state to another. They have defined endpoints. Being in our one of our masculine modes – for a long time – is different. These are not questing, they instead become controlling. Learn to discern the difference!)

Returning to examples of how we react to a life-shock by “pivoting” into our masculine modes: Another woman, a dear friend, was in love. Her lover was powerful, influential, and wealthy. She was exploring and moving into her feminine modes when she met him. Especially, she was opening up her Hathor – her Pleasure-Goddess. Her long, russet hair played freely in the breeze. She wore long, flowing dresses. She was in love with life. Her lover desired those qualities that he saw in her. He promised “protection.” He pledged his heart to her – and promised to divorce his wife. (Whom he said, in the classic sense, did not “understand” him.)

A while later, he told her – it had all been a mistake. He was returning to his wife. The time with her had been wonderful, it had been incredible, it had opened his heart – he would always treasure the memory. But there she was. Out on her own. No lover, and no more mirage of the support of a lover.

Her Hathor felt alone and exposed. Defenseless and scared.

So what did she do?

The only thing possible. She reacted. She slammed down – hard – on her Hathor. She got a job where (she was kindly informed) it would be “best” for her if she put her hair up in a bun. And this new job drew heavily on her Emperor skills. Spreadsheets and checklists. Time management and deliverables.

And because her Hathor was scared (Hathor knows about play – not about defending the fortress), her Hathor submitted to the new lifestyle. It was about survival. And she still lives the dichotomy. When it comes to survival, she emphasizes her Emperor strengths – and disowns her Hathor.

I have done the same. In fact, I shut down – hard – on my inner Hathor when I was very young. And I won’t blame family, or society, or pubescent angst, or any one thing more than anything else. And I’ll fully acknowledge that I chose – I created – my life in order to have these experiences and to learn these lessons.

However this came about, though, when I was about twelve years old, I shut down hard on my Hathor. With a vengeance.

And it has been the hardest thing that I’ve ever done to claim her back.

As with my friends – and with many of you – being in one of my masculine archetypes has represented “safety.” Sometimes it was Emperor. (My least favorite.) Sometimes Magician. (I learned to become a scientific inventor, and wrote four patents. Ground-breaking and magnificent in scope, each one. And each now in the hands of others.) Sometimes a Hierophant. (I’ve taught in several universities, and had my own dance school for aabout twenty years.)

In each case, the masculine “mode” has vied to be “in charge.” Each has wanted to control my life – and very often, I’ve let “him.”

So as a result, I’ve spent years at work – becoming a strong scientist and inventor, and even (more recently) a good businessperson. And of course, sacrificed many evenings, weekends, and holidays to the masculine motif.

But I’ve been determined to “break through.”

And the method?

I’ve been deliberately cultivating my inner Hathor – and my inner High Priestess.

For the past year, I’ve been doing the kind of work that has paved the way. Sometimes it has been simply housecleaning – every corner of the house, every pile of paper, moving out piles of “stuff.” (This allows a new wind to come through. And it’s very hard for Hathor to play, or for my High Priestess to have calm insights, when things are messy and disorderly.)

I’ve been doing physical conditioning of all sorts – and with the warmer weather, I’ve been walking much more. (This has always been one of the best ways to let our High Priestess come through. Julia Cameron, in the Vein of Gold, recommends a Daily Walk.)

And I’ve been focusing on pleasure. (My favorite source for encouraging Hathor is Mama Gena’s works, particularly Mama Gena’s School of the Womanly Arts.

Prayer (or at least, quiet time and “listening-in”) and play: the two vital themes.

Also, forgiveness. I’ve been doing A Course in Miracles for several months now, and yes – the “miracles” have been happening. Shifts in how I think. Shifts in how things are happening in my life. More focus. More energy. The daily exercises are challenging, though. Most recently, they’ve focused on letting go of grievances – and this has been an essential component.

What I’ve found is that experiences with any one man – or even with an aspect of the world – reflect an attitude or a judgment that I’ve made inside myself. So if I’ve entered into a relationship with a man who does not really honor my feminine aspects (business or personal), it is because that man accurately reflects how I am not honoring my femininity.

What has helped me to put such full attention on making this breakthrough is realizing that being (dominantly) in the masculine modes – for so many years – has simply not been effective.

It’s as though my Hathor and other feminine modes have at some level sabotaged the inner masculine ones. They’ve not allowed the masculine modes to receive the full adulation and acclaim that their pre-eminance (at least in my life) would seem to have drawn.

And why should they? After all, this would be an imbalance.

So my Hathor and High Priestess – both very unhappy – have sabotaged the “authority” of the masculine. In many ways, over many years. (Including various “dis-eases” – to the point that I’m lucky to be alive!)

Through a concerted effort – culminating this last month – of having substantial “quiet time” when the various archetypes could work things out, we’ve finally agreed. Hathor is number one. She’s the Queen. She makes the important calls (and the not-so-important ones as well!).

High Priestess is the moderator. She’s the observer. She notes when the other archetypes are yielding to Hathor, and when they need to be brought to heel. She also lets Hathor know when it’s time to “go Emperor” for a while – when a project simply needs to be done. (And then there’s a little dialogue – a little, “How can we make this project as pleasurable as possible?” Because Hathor is always the one who is to be satisfied.)

Empress is important also – she’s the one who wants connection. Family, girlfriends, pets, gardens – she’s always about connecting. About the “feel-good” factor that comes from oxytocin. That comes from bonding. So she’s always important as well.

The “men in my life”? That would be my Magician, my Emperor, and my Hierophant. Three wonderful, loving, caring men – now that their roles are carefully defined. Each of them now “lives to serve the Queen!” (See P.S. note at bottom, on why they are the way they are.)

And unlike some men in times past who have professed this intention, now I expect it to manifest more happily and completely in my life. Because my internal “masculine modes” are living to “serve the Queen,” and NOT the other way around.

This has taken time. It’s taken a huge focus and push. It’s taken an immense amount of physical work – moving boxes, cleaning odd spaces, pruning bushes – while letting the inner “psychic surge” work its way out. And it’s taken letting all the “masculine modes” know that the Hathor-Queen is now in charge. To the point where they’ve all come and prooffered their crowns, and pledged fealty.

Darlings, this is the most exciting and wonderful adventure. And I’ll let you know how it unfolds, so stay tuned!

Yours in the “dance of life” – Alay’nya

P.S. – On “why men are the way they are” – even in our internal modes, or archetypes. They are that way because they have to be. It’s that simple. They (both men in their masculinity – and us, when we access our masculine archetypes) – are effective at least in part because they seize control. An Emperor governs and establishes his kingdom through taking control and mandating that which should be done. And of course, there’s some wooing and charming, and some alliance-building, to be done. But an Emperor governs. He rules. And to do this, he takes control. He has to.

Similarly, a Magician – if he is to make his creation “real” in the world, must seize every resource and tool, every ounce of personal energy, and every moment of time. Creative genius is real, and it requires total commitment, passion, and focus. So any of us, in our Magician-moments, is totally wrapped up in our creation.

And our Hierophant? Ah, that’s the most subtle of them all. Our Hierophant, after all, is Feeling-oriented. (Unlike our Magician and our Emperor, who are Thinking.)

But our Hierophant lives not just to coach and mentor and guide, but to facilitate our breakthroughs. Our Hierophant is like a Zen Master who knows when to slap the student on the side of the head – so that he can get a breakthrough. (Going through a curriculum, step-by-step, is much more Emperor than Hierophant. And designing the curriculum is more Magician.)

So if our Hierophant is so wonderful, what’s the challenge?

It is simply that he, like our other masculine modes, is closed-ended. He wants us to gain insights and breakthroughs – to develop our genius – within the system. Our Hierophant, much though we love him, is very structured.

Our Hierophant does not really understand our Hathor. He just doesn’t “get” her open-endedness, her focus on pleasure-in-the-moment. Her desire for play.

So here’s the conundrum. For our Hathor to come out and play – safely – she needs the structure given to her by her masculine modes; Emperor, Magician, and Hierophant. And at the same time, once these modes are “given an inch,” they each want to “take a mile.” They LOVE taking over our lives, and all societal messages support them.

How do we solve this?

By giving our Magician, Emperor, and Hierophant – most especially our Hierophant (who is indeed most Feeling-oriented) a mission. A sense of purpose. Something that appeals to their masculinity.

They exist to serve the Queen.

Do this, and their lives have sense and make meaning.

Fail in this, and no matter how many achievements they create, their lives are barren. (And they probably won’t really have the success that they’re desiring either.)

Do I have examples in mind?

Most certainly. (How to dish without naming names? Hmmm. And believe me, I’ll point the finger to my own life as much as to others … )

This is probably the most important lesson that we can learn. This, in fact, defines our mastery moment.

More in the next blog.